Rod and reproof produce wisdom, But a lad out of control is a disgrace to his mother. Proverbs 29:15 (JPS)
Recently I was at a parental meeting and the discussion was about the rod of discipline. What exactly is the rod of authority? Is it the kiboko that we used to have in schools? I was pleasantly surprised at what the bible had to say about this.
A rod and reproof will produce wisdom. The purpose of the rod is to produce wisdom. Its impact may not be short-term, but long-term. One of the questions we need to ask about parenting is whether it is to produce well-behaved children or well-behaved parents (in other words the children grow up to become well-behaved adults). Producing well-behaved adults is a different kettle of fish. One may need to do a lot more explaining than spanking.
The word ‘rod’ (shebet) means a branch used as a staff, scepter, spear, writing implement or measuring rod. In the Hebrew language, the same word (shebet) signified both scepter and staff, particularly the rod or staff which belonged to each Hebrew tribe as a sign of their authority. In other words the rod was a sign of authority. So, it is authority and reproof (instruction) that produce wisdom.
This was the same word used for the scepter that the King used when allowing Esther to approach. It defined what Esther could and could not do. It set ones boundaries. We cannot parent from a distance. We need to be engaged, and this is not with the spanking rod. It is more with setting boundaries for the child and explaining the consequences of transgressing those boundaries.
The King James Version was written during particularly difficult times. Its language was more brutal than most. This is why it associates the rod with kiboko. We need to disconnect some of our understandings of scripture from cultural interpretations and see it through kingdom eyes. Set boundaries for your child. Explain the purpose of those boundaries. Disciple for the long term and not for tomorrow. Be engaged.